Fangs

For nineteen years, I was just an ordinary Californian guy. Until a car crash almost killed me, and Count Dracula suddenly stuck his teeth into my throat. As his great-great-grandnephew and rightful heir, he ships me off to freaking Transylvania to learn how to be a vampire the hard way: with no staff to eat, no chance to escape, and no Wi-Fi. It's just the place to go mental. And starve. But there's this girl. Abigail... For some reason, she likes to roam the dark and musty castle. She claims to know nothing about vampires, but I swear she tries to kill me every damn time we meet. I would have invited her to be my dinner last night if she hadn't fled with something very dear do me. My fang. Now, I'm waiting for sundown to find her and get my tooth back. And then I'll kill the werewolf that howls in the forest, because that's actually the one condition under which Uncle Vlad allows me to return home. But the wolf problem is harder to solve than expected. And Abigail's cookie-like scent is making me do really stupid things...